Day Four, Cincinnati OH: The Buckeye State

I’ve been in Cincinnati for the last several days, staying with some family. It’s been an enjoyable time and I’m starting to get used to the heat. What constitutes a heat wave back in Michigan is just the normal weather pattern in Cincinnati, (and I understand that there has been quite the heat wave back home). I’ve spent months in Cincinnati throughout my life, and the heat is only a problem when I’m coming from an especially mild Spring, like this one.

Ohio is a little bit different than Michigan in a few other respects. A lot of Michiganders seem to think that Ohio is a land full of country bumpkins. I’m not quite sure where this comes from, as Michigan isn’t exactly the most sophisticated state. But there are three things that strongly differentiate Ohio from Michigan. First, there always seems to be a stronger sense of personal responsibility in Ohio, slightly stronger than that found in Michigan. There are very few “no turn on red” signs and no motorcycle helmet law. Rather than charge the state with their safety and protection, the natural course here seems to be one of self-preservation without government intervention. Second, Ohio is very hilly country. The roads do a lot of winding (in fact, there is a Zig Zag Road), and there are plenty of sharp turns through forests, which, (back to the first point) are kept naturally scenic, instead of littering them with warning signs and obtrusive guardrails. If you’ve spent most of your time in Michigan, it’s difficult to realize that you’re really sitting on what is, essentially, a giant table.

Thirdly, and this is oft-noted amongst our family, Ohio drivers are not known for the exceptional ability to handle an automobile at fast speeds. Speed limits top out around 65. This is only five below Michigan, where the “actual” speed limit is around 80. The difference is that Ohio license plates seem to contain speed governors as well, limiting their speed of transit to a point between 60-65mph. Great for gas mileage, but not so great for getting places quickly. In addition, the highway lanes suffer from an odd mirror-imaging effect, in that slow drivers are on the right, and slower drivers are on the left. Surprisingly, this isn’t just propaganda behind another Michigan v. Ohio border skirmish; Ohio drivers seem to notice the same thing about their inability to keep to the right.

I’ve read a couple books, stuffed myself full of Skyline, picked up several last-minute equipment additions, and fit a few games of bowling in. Right now, I’m writing this post on my Aunt and Uncle’s deck, laying down on my RidgeRest. These sleeping pads are like a yoga mat that’s both lightweight and extremely comfortable, not to mention cheap and indestructible.

(The scenic view I’m enjoying while I write this brings up another thing that I’d meant to address. Some of you guys have sent me your addresses for postcards already. If you haven’t yet done so, feel free to email me or text me your address and I’ll send one along to you as well. If you don’t like mail, I won’t be offended.)

The book I just finished is called Six Minutes to Freedom; the story of American ex-pat Kurt Muse’s 1989 arrest and imprisonment by the Panamanian Defense Forces. Muse’s crime was the organization of a clandestine radio network that spoke against “Maximum Leader” Manuel Noriega, in an attempt undermine Noriega’s soul-crushing regime and free Muse’s adopted country from his grasp. The book focuses on the psychological impact that such a tragedy has on both the family and the victim himself. (If you’re looking for a straight-up tale of survival amidst the most dire circumstances and against unimaginable odds, I would check out Marcus Luttrell’s Lone Survivor. This is one of my favorite books.)

What’s next? On Wednesday night, I head to Bloomington, Indiana, where I’ll be staying with a friend for the night. I’ll be spending another night camping outside of Bloomington before heading to St. Louis, where I’ll be staying for the weekend. The people I’m staying with here promise a fun-filled weekend of Cardinals baseball, frozen custard, and local breweries. Next, I’ll be heading to Kansas City, where I’ll fit in some Royal’s baseball inside a couple days. Then it’s on to Denver. So the real adventure starts soon.

Interestingly, with 5.9 million people and two baseball teams, Missouri is the least-populated state with more than one team. Others include California (36.7, 5 teams), Texas (24.3, 2), New York (19.4, 2), Florida (18.3, 2), Illinois (12.9, 2), Pennsylvania (12.2, 2), and Ohio, (11.5, 2) – which all comprise the seven most populated states in the country. Missouri’s population of 2.45 million per team is the lowest of any state, besides the Washington (DC) National’s .6 million. Thus, I support removing Missouri’s excess team and giving it to the 8th-most populated state in the country, because this would be the fair thing to do. That state happens to be Michigan. We’ll take the Cardinals, please, Mr. Selig. Thank you.

Now it’s off to the store to gather fixings for a giant, custom-built bag of trail mix.